I got banned from Facebook

One morning I woke up to a notification from Facebook.

"You can't send messages for 7 days."

Great. Just what I needed while trying to grow a newsletter from zero. The irony? I was finally making progress.

But let's rewind a bit.

The Post That Actually Worked

Remember how I failed miserably with Facebook groups the first time around? This time I tried something different. Instead of assembling generic content and spamming links, I actually thought about what I'd want to see if I were scrolling through the group myself.

The format ended up being pretty straightforward. I'd write a quick hook at the top, something relatable about the week or the city. Then I'd share my personal picks, maybe 3-5 events I'd genuinely consider doing. Not an exhaustive list. Just things that sounded interesting to me. Sometimes I'd throw in a question at the end asking if anyone knew about other events happening.

I avoided links completely. Didn't mention the newsletter. Just shared what seemed useful.

And people actually started engaging. My posts were getting dozens of interactions, sometimes a 100+. Not too bad!

But before I even started posting regularly, I did something I should have done the first time around. I messaged the admin of the biggest group in town. It's a group where people mostly share photos of the city, so I wasn't sure if event posts would fly. I DM'd him, explaining not only what I wanted to do, but also why. My deeper goal is not growing the newsletter, sell ads, and get rich. I really want to contribute on creating a community where people can connect, trust, and live the city. And yes, of course make the business sustainable somehow, so I can keep providing value consistently.

Anyway, turns out the group admin loved the idea. Gave me full support.

That conversation made all the difference.

The DM Strategy

Once a post got some traction, I'd jump into the comments and reply to everyone as fast as I could. This seemed to help keep the post visible to more people, which meant more engagement, which meant more visibility. A little feedback loop.

After things settled down, I started sending DMs. Not to everyone in the group, just to people who had liked the post or left a comment. Basically anyone who seemed remotely interested.

The first message was pretty simple:

"Hey! I saw you liked my post about events this week. Glad you found something useful! By the way, I actually have a newsletter where I share all these events. Would that be something you'd be interested in receiving?"

Most people replied. Usually with something like "Yes, thanks!" or they'd give me feedback about the events.

Then I'd send a second message:

"Nice! Can you write me your email so I can add you before the next issue?"

And they'd just... give it to me. Right there in the DM. No links. No fancy landing page. No friction.

I was manually adding each email to my email service provider one by one. It was tedious, but honestly kind of great. I could see which email providers people used, catch typos before adding them, and bound a relationship with the reader.

I could also easily see first hand who my audience was. I've got the confirmation that women were way more curious, gentle and open to subscribing than men. And let's be honest: women are the true decision makers. Men follow.

When you're starting from zero, this kind of direct contact is worth way more than any analytics dashboard.

The Ban

Then I got cocky.

One day, instead of asking someone for their email directly like I'd been doing, I thought I'd save some time and just sent them a link to my landing page.

Facebook banned me from sending DMs shortly later.

I could still use the platform. Still post. Still comment. Just no messages for a week.

The timing was brutal. I had a bunch of people messaging me during that week saying they wanted to subscribe, and I literally couldn't ask for their emails. I just had to watch the messages come in and do nothing.

Turns out Facebook really doesn't like links in DMs. Noted.

The Results

Despite the ban, I hit 200 subscribers in the first month.

Two hundred real people who wanted to receive my newsletter. In a city where I barely knew anyone a few months ago. With content I was still figuring out as I went.

That felt huge.

But then New Year's came around. I took a break, stopped posting, stopped DMing. Which was fine, I needed it. But when I came back in January, my subscriber count was exactly where I left it.

200.

The problem became pretty obvious. No input=no output. This whole thing doesn't grow by itself. My growth can rely completely on manual DMs, and I definitely can't risk getting banned again.

I needed something more predictable, automated and, most importantly, legit. Turns out asking personal data on Facebook DMs is not exactly compliant with their policy (you don't say?).

It seems a good moment to try ads. Which is funny, because I'd never run a Meta ad in my life. But if I want to keep growing without burning out or getting banned again, I have to figure it out.

Keep shipping,
Michele